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Let’s end the ‘meno belly’ shaming

Let’s put an end to the ‘meno belly’ shaming.

While menopause is having a moment debunking hormone replacement therapy myths from the 2002 Women’s Health Initiative, there’s one other toxic menopause narrative that must be addressed. We’re expected to conform to cultural body shape and size ideals that don’t honor the natural body changes that occur in menopause and with aging.

As a post-menopausal woman, I’ve experienced those shifts. And as a healthcare professional, I’m concerned that unrealistic body standards can create a never-ending war with our bodies. Those ideals damage our body image and self-esteem and can lead to disordered eating and exercise behaviors that are normalized in midlife and beyond.

To truly advance menopause wellbeing, healthcare professionals must honor midlife+ body changes and shift away from the body control narrative to help our patients and clients focus on body care, capability, and gratitude instead.

Positive body language matters

Stigmatizing body language has no place in an empowered menopause space.

Pathologizing midlife+ body changes is problematic. “Blast your meno belly fat” shame-filled messaging needs to go. Words that describe our bodies as broken and require fixing undermine our basic human need to be accepted, fit in, and be seen as healthy and worthy.

Realistic messaging respects the redistribution of body fat from our hips and thighs to our abdomen is a natural part of the menopausal process due to hormonal shifts. It’s not caused by something we’ve done wrong or should feel ashamed about or need to hide. But because we’re bombarded by messages insisting that we get rid of it, we might feel like we must cover up.

Collectively, by normalizing midlife body changes, we can change that.

“We often think about the changes in girls’ bodies during puberty and how that can influence self-consciousness, teasing, bullying, and eating disorder risk. But we talk less about how those changes around the menopause transition can have a similar effect,” says Cynthia Bulik, founding director of the University of North Carolina Center of Excellence in Eating Disorders, in a “Today’s Dietitian” article titled “Menopause and Eating Disorders.”

Hormonal changes impact body shape in puberty and again through the menopause transition. That’s why menopause is referred to as a second puberty. Most women gain an average of 8 to 15 lbs. during the menopausal transition reports author Margo Maine in her book “Pursuing Perfection: Eating Disorders, Body Myths, and Women at Midlife and Beyond.” While body shape shifts occur due to hormonal changes, weight increases in midlife+ are attributed to many factors including aging, genetics, and lifestyle shifts.

When we reframe midlife+ body changes as a natural part of the menopausal transition and the aging process, we can put an end to the  ‘meno belly’ shaming and the pressure to fix and control our bodies. We can focus instead on caring for them.

menopause wellbeing

No magical menopause diet

When I read over those “Blast your meno belly fat” tips, they were simply nutrition and lifestyle recommendations that I would advise for anyone in midlife+. Nothing listed would magically blast anything away —because there is no special “menopause diet.”

Val Schonberg, Menopause Society Certified Practitioner (MSCP) and Registered Dietitian (RD) agrees. In a recent Instagram post, Schonberg shares that “misleading women that there is a ‘safe or proven’ solution to ‘control’ menopausal weight (and feel better about their body) isn’t any different than any other manipulation of body weight such as dieting, drugs, or other forms of restrictive eating.”

“It’s another form of gaslighting menopausal women who are already distressed and confused about this stage of life,” says Schonberg.

Even if a program promotes quality lifestyle and nutritional advice like increasing fiber, let’s be mindful of the same old diet culture messaging —if you follow this plan perfectly for 30 days, you’ll see results. And perhaps you do. But I’ll remind you: it’s completely normal and expected after the 30 days to return to being human and naturally imperfect. Yet we blame ourselves. We say we just got “off track.” We’ve been here before. Stuck in the same old vicious diet culture cycle.

Those menopause plans instill false hope that we’ll permanently return to our pre-menopause body shape and size. We deserve better. Let’s not fall prey to diet culture, once again.

Eating and exercise in menopause

While recommending a menopause plan might seem benign, it’s not.

Recognize that women going through the menopause transition – which encompasses perimenopause through menopause – are at elevated risk of eating disorders. Eating disorders are more likely to be missed in midlife based on two false beliefs: that we’re too old and/or don’t fit the stereotypical body type – thin.

In her article, “Menopause & Eating Disorders,” registered dietitian, Carrie Dennett recommends that healthcare professionals screen for eating disorders and make referrals to eating-disorder-informed providers when necessary.

Furthermore, in the fitness space, Amanda Thebe, personal trainer and author of “Menopocalypse,” shares that “women are so much more than how they look, and the focus needs to change. There is a growing movement in the fitness world to show women that aging and menopause can be liberating.”

The reality: even if we do “all the right things,” our bodies will change with aging. Let’s honor them with respect and care.

Our bodies, our homes for life

“Your body is your life partner. Not your life’s project,” says registered dietitian nutritionist (RDN) and pro-aging, body liberation advocate, Deb Benfield. She believes we must blaze a liberating new path to a respectful, nurturing relationship with our aging bodies. And I agree.

At a time when menopause is having a moment, we have the profound opportunity to shape-shift the narrative around midlife+ body changes to truly advance menopause wellbeing.

Let’s put an end to the ‘meno belly’ shaming.

  • For more on menopause wellbeing, please read Menopause myths stymie real growth. ♡ Tanya(Published in the September 18, 2024 edition of the Jackson Hole News and Guide).

 

Menopause myths stymie real growth

Prompting 3,000 comments and ranking as one of the most read stories of 2023, the New York Times article Women Have Been Misled About Menopause by Susan Dominus made it clear that people going through menopause — about half the population, want to talk about it and want to be taken seriously.

Instead of the doom and gloom, invisibility narrative of aging, the sweaty menopause jokes and just suck it up and deal with it (it’s not really that bad) attitude, we deserve a comprehensive, anti-shame, pro-embodiment approach.

We want evidence-based facts, not information from a 32-year-old Insta-influencer. We want options to treat symptoms that may profoundly affect the quality of our lives. We want support with every facet of our wellbeing so that we emerge boldly from our reproductive years, sharing our wisdom with zest and, most importantly, so that we may thrive.

As a 55-year-old, post-menopausal woman, that’s the conversation I needed more than ten years ago when I started experiencing perimenopausal symptoms – hot flashes, night sweats that led to poor sleep and fatigue, anxiety, joint pain, forgetting what I was saying mid-sentence. Those are just some of 34 plus symptoms cited by the North American Menopause Society (NAMS). I didn’t know that those signs were signaling the beginning of my transition toward menopause and that for me, they’d last more than a decade.

Desperate to ease my discomfort I dove down the rabbit hole of Dr. Google and loads of misinformation and in particular, DIY hormone programs promising to fix my “broken” hormones. Let me spare you the time, money, energy, and years that I spent on those restrictive food plans. No, they did not relieve my symptoms. And honestly, I bet the stress from food restriction and under fueling my exercise aggravated my symptoms and perhaps contributed to my osteopenia diagnosis after a recent DEXA scan for bone density.

My menopause experience could have been much different.

Menopause support
Menopause support

In Dominus’s article, she shares the history of menopausal hormone therapy and how it used to be the most prescribed treatment in the United States. But in 2002, a single study, The Women’s Health Initiative, imperfect in its design, found links between hormone therapy and elevated health risks for women of all ages. Panic set in and prescriptions plummeted.

Hormone therapy carries risks, to be sure, as do many medications that people take to relieve serious discomfort, but dozens of studies since 2002 have provided reassurance that for many people the benefits of taking hormones outweigh the risks says Dominus.

That being said, hormones are not a cure-all. ‘Hormone therapy is not a fountain of youth and shouldn’t be used for that purpose,” says medical director of the NAMS, Dr. Stephanie Faubion.

Today, you have a range of options for symptom relief that may include hormone-therapy, non-hormonal drugs, and recommendations like cognitive behavior therapy for hot flashes, based on your health history and risk factors. Find a menopause informed healthcare provider to support you and screen for health conditions that you’re more vulnerable to such as cardiovascular disease, diabetes, dementia. Discuss medication options if needed and give your attention to modifiable behaviors to reduce your risk.

Expanding the menopause conversation

An empowered approach to menopause includes exploring all facets of your wellbeing. Learn strategies to regulate your emotions and manage stress such as journaling, calling a friend who’s a good listener or scheduling time with a mental health professional. Reap the many benefits of physical activity like supporting your heart and bone health. Nurture your relationships, social connections, spiritual wellbeing and prioritize joy and fun.

And let’s talk nutrition. There are many strategies to support menopausal health such as adding in fiber-filled whole grains to lower your cholesterol and blood sugar levels versus eliminating and restricting foods. Don’t get sidelined by diet culture nonsense that promises to fix your hormones and body.

Normalize menopause body changes

We deserve shame-free conversations about midlife body changes. As an exercise coach in my early perimenopausal years, I couldn’t imagine the menopausal reality of gaining weight and not having a flat stomach in the future. Even with no changes to your diet or exercise, it’s normal and natural to find yourself sizing up. Clothes weren’t designed to fit post menopause bodies where hormonal changes contribute to the re-distribution of body fat from our thighs and hips to our abdomens. Move beyond the scale and outward appearance. Approach your aging, changing body with this comprehensive pro-embodiment approach to your wellbeing.

We’re not less of ourselves on the other side of menopause, were more.

More powerful beyond menopause

“There’s a veritable legion of people post menopause who feel even more like themselves – even better, more at home in their bodies,” says author Heather Corinna in her book “What Fresh Hell Is This: Perimenopause, Menopause, Other Indignities, And You.”

We’re more direct. “The force of the impulse to speak out will feel like driving a Maserati for the first time – it takes a little while to get used to the power,” says Dr. Louann Brizendine, author of “The Upgrade: How the Female Brain Gets Stronger and Better in Midlife and Beyond.

Consider that 80% of Forbes’ 100 most powerful women of 2024 are 50 plus and the No.1 woman is 65 years old. She’s Ursula von der Leyen, President of the European Commission.

“Post-menopausal people express big feelings of freedom, self-acceptance, confidence, connection, and deeper intimacy, of being able to find a clarity about their wants and feelings and a greater ability to express them,” says Corinna. “Margaret Freaking Mead talked about the power of this post-menopausal zest.”

Empowered conversations about menopause honor that knowledge is power — and that we can be more powerful beyond menopause.

(This article was originally published in the March 27, 2024 edition of the Jackson Hole News and Guide).